my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
