I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Let's get the cat blown out
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
