whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i think my tv is drunk
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
