For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
