no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Do you still have your period?
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
