thus making me awesome and them whores
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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