I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
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