Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
