"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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