He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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