What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize
