last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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