I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
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