i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
