you suck at this game today
Umm I'm too high to move.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.