R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize