Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
