and next time when you feel me up, do it right
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
