I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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