just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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