Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
There's a naked man in my car right now.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize
