Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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