...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
you have to choose: penises or morals?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
