Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
accomplished twins. life is a go
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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