I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
