when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
