I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I'm getting married
To pizza
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
