R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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