This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
