It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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