My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
