I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
