Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
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