His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
