i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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