She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
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I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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