My nipple is on Facebook.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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