Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Randomize