I bet he comes in French.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
send nudes
from the living room?
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
