Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Randomize
