I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize