OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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