the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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