Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
