Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Randomize
