he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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