Texts From Last Night

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  (972): View more from Texas

  how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes

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  (972): how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes http://tfl.nu/yix3
  Replies (73) Good night (1101) Bad night (3805)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.

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  (708): so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone. http://tfl.nu/y8ai
  Replies (16) Good night (4619) Bad night (906)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly

  (1-208): View more from Idaho

  What is a GED?

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  (208): Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly (1-208): What is a GED? http://tfl.nu/qgi3
  Replies (47) Good night (1028) Bad night (9939)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.

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  (954): Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka. http://tfl.nu/l16y
  Replies (12) Good night (5198) Bad night (986)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"

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  (905): I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by" http://tfl.nu/6dm5
  Replies (12) Good night (1113) Bad night (2522)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Me toooooo!! Margaritas

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good

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  (773): Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach (630): Me toooooo!! Margaritas (773): I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good http://tfl.nu/3y14
  Replies (53) Good night (1328) Bad night (3851)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!

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  (904): I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms! http://tfl.nu/g8iv
  Replies (3) Good night (1090) Bad night (680)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME

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  (541): next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME http://tfl.nu/v34b
  Replies (3) Good night (1147) Bad night (471)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock

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  (206): True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock http://tfl.nu/7m7l
  Replies (2) Good night (622) Bad night (328)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum

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  (412): Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum http://tfl.nu/plc1
  Replies (0) Good night (627) Bad night (345)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?

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  (314): Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does? http://tfl.nu/d7kp
  Replies (5) Good night (336) Bad night (669)
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.

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  (705): So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that. http://tfl.nu/fs4o
  Replies (0) Good night (319) Bad night (528)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day

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  (847): We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day http://tfl.nu/szgm
  Replies (4) Good night (497) Bad night (271)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.

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  (815): HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK. http://tfl.nu/waoa
  Replies (1) Good night (244) Bad night (479)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening

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  (508): I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening http://tfl.nu/7pf2
  Replies (2) Good night (223) Bad night (81)

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