yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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