ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
