I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize