AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
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